We all know the holidays can bring up unwanted emotions. For many people, it’s the time of year when you gather with friends and family you may have not seen for a while. It’s common that these social gatherings often include unsolicited advice, opinions and even personal questions. Also, when you add in social media to the mix with everyone posting their holiday engagements, lavish gifts, or picture perfect families it’s no wonder so many people experience anxiety, and fall victim to the comparison game. Don’t pretend it isn’t happening, don’t bypass the emotions… instead read below to learn how to combat them:
If someone has something you desire, then this is an amazing opportunity for you to use them as an expander. In manifestation teachings, an expander is referred to as someone who is already living the life you want to manifest or already has the thing you are trying to call in. When you see that someone you know has this life or this thing it EXPANDS your minds understanding that it is possible. Rather than it being an unrealistic fantasy in your head the universe is showing to you how possible and real your dreams are.
For example, before I met Andrew I loved seeing couples who were authentically in love and appeared like they were truly best friends. I loved being witness to this, hearing their story, and even taking mental note of all the qualities they had that I hoped to someday find in my future relationship.
Whatever it is about the other person that is making you feel the need to compare yourself… COMPLIMENT them on it. Let them know how much you love their hair, or outfit. Let them know how you admire their career, relationship, or children. Whatever it is… vocalize to them how kickass you think it is. Not only will this make them feel amazing but it will have you feeling amazing to. Vocalizing this instead of internalizing it also takes it from an icky feeling to a positive one.
For example, Abraham Hicks teachings state that when you communicate what you like you are sending a ‘rocket of desire’ out into the universe. Essentially you are letting the universe know what you want so that it can come to you. I love telling people “I want my hair to look as healthy as yours” or “My goal is to be as dedicated to my fitness as you are”.
Give yourself permission to pause during the extreme hustle and bustle mentality of this season. Take frequent inventory of your emotions. Notice when you feel yourself spiraling into negative territory and take a step back to re-adjust your vibration. This is when the tools of saying mantras, meditating, and using breathing exercises become extremely important. No matter where you are or what you are doing it is okay to step into a private space (like the bathroom) and take a few minutes to pause. Close your eyes, take long, deep breaths then when you ready you can return to the holiday gathering.
For example, both Andrew and I have big and LOUD families. I personally struggle with this at times because I am very open and intuitive so I pick up other peoples emotions like a sponge. It is important for me to listen to my inner guidance and step away when needed. Often I will escape to the bathroom and do some shoulder stretches and deep breaths. I also do not hesitate to go home when I feel its time even if it means being the first to leave.